Saturday, March 09, 2013

Where am I

Today one of my friends asked me the very two questions I don't know the answer to:

1. How are you?
2. What is your plan?

Right now, honestly, I am not okay. I feel exhausted. Waking up in the morning isn't anymore joyous and takes effort when it shouldn't. I read and find myself only half-tied to the words. They mean something I'm sure of it, and yet I can't convince myself anymore that they do. The fact that I have to convince myself in the first place is already telling in itself.

This kind of fatigue is ironic because I haven't really been doing anything for the past couple of weeks. Going home to my parents was nice, but I can't burden them with my life anymore. They're happy now; they deserve not to worry about me.

A plan. Yes, there had been a plan. The plan had been ambitious and wonderful. I was supposed to be on my way to graduate school by this time, with a loving boyfriend, with a job that doesn't pay much but pays enough. Instead my life is turning out the complete opposite.





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